Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #30

It was brought to my attention that a lot of the reasons I've written about are all just derivations of one reason, which is having more personal time. And yes, that's technically true. But I think that's just as general as saying that all of outer space is just a bunch of particles. Of course it is. But they all form other things. Just like that extra personal time becomes many different formations of my life. It gives me more room to branch out and grow. Each of the branches have a meaning and relevance of their own, even if they stem from the same place.

I thought about different ways I would end my 30 reasons. I thought about a Grand Finale. But I wasn't feeling it now that time has come. So I think I want to end it by writing about a concept I've contemplated, something that's a work in progress.

I've read many times that if you are waiting or looking for the love of your life, to stop doing that, and start doing the things you love, and then they will find you. That sounds so simple. But it implies three important things. First, that you can fully identify all the things that you love and are most important to you. Second, that you are willing and able to prioritize them and commit the energy to pursuing them. And last, that you're willing to pursue them all on your own, regardless of whether or not there's someone that shares the passion to do them with you. One good example is this: I really want to do a lot of international travel. That's one thing I've probably held off on making as much of a priority as I should have, because of a lack of having to someone to do that with.

So being single (and having more free time) is my chance to hone in on what is going to make me and my life the most fulfilled and happy, without anyone else's agendas getting in the mix. It lends me the freedom to explore what is most important to me, and to recognize the importance to prioritize and pursue these things, even if it means a solo adventure. And that is my current challenge. To not wait for things in life to happen, and instead to make life happen. I will do what I love, and in that I will find love.

So, happy living, everyone. May we all have love and joy wherever we're at in life. Namaste!

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #29

Because it's more fun getting dressed to go out when you're single. Getting dressed when I'm single, like a friend said to me, is marketing. Whether you intend to or not, you're baiting a hook. Going out in relationship, I'm just getting dressed to look cute for a few hours and end the night like usual. When you get dressed to out when you're single, you can't be sure what's in store for the night. I might not be explaining this well right now, but there is a difference. And the prior is a little more fun.

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #28

Because there is a supa-fine boy in the 8pm yoga class on Thursdays. And one of the things that's even more fun than watching him do yoga is plotting how I'm going to start a conversation with him and eventually make out with him. Can't do that when I'm in a relationship.

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #27

Because as much as I hate doing it, I have more time to get things done around the house. (This reason is even less glamorous than the farting reason in my opinion.) Yes, I'd rather be watching movies and making love, but the laundry needs to get done sometime and so do the dishes and vacuuming. Because I have more available time, I'm not scrambling to get them done between another 10 things in one day. I can do my chores with more leisure and they suck a little less that way.

(P.S. - This is all true, but I'm honestly not convinced this is a good reason. I'm just glad I have clean underwear and got to watch 2 episodes of Orange Is the New Black tonight.)

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #26

Because I only have my own problems and/or frustrations to deal with. Couples are entangled in each others lives. Things like bad moods, car problems, work stress, family issues, if your partner is dealing with it, to a certain extent, you are too. And I don't mean to sound selfish or unsympathetic. It's great to be in a relationship to have support and be supportive. I'm just saying that we all have our own life issues or stress to deal with, and right now, the only ones I have to address are my own. Sometimes less is more.

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #25

Because first dates are fun. They usually always end with either a good feeling, or a good story. And when you're in a relationship, you only get one. ;)

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #24

Because there are often times when I'm in a position where I need to learn how to do challenging things on my own. There's no valiant boyfriend to call on for his muscles and/or technical skills. But when I rise to meet the challenge and succeed, I feel awfully proud about learning a new skill and achieving a heightened level of self-sufficiency. Now, this reason is juxtapose to my reason #20, where I write about being comfortable asking for help, and receiving help from friends. They are both valid reasons and each have their place in my single, independent life. But I don't really think it's a good idea to impose on my friends for every arduous task I encounter. I've got to save the favors for particularly rainy days. So when I'm faced with something I know might be possible for me to accomplish on my own, with a little bit of research, resourcefulness, and elbow grease, I put the effort in to make it happen. And the end result is very rewarding. Today, for example, I lugged my new, *heavy* window AC unit upstairs to my second floor apartment, dragged it into my bedroom, disassembled my old unit, and installed the new one, all by myself. I procrastinated doing this for a week. I went through a mental list of all of my man friends that might love me enough to lend me a hand. Yet, I knew I had to give it a shot on my own. So I tried, and succeeded. And at the end of the day, I feel accomplished, industrious, competent, and proud. If I were in a relationship, I wouldn't have hesitated for a moment before asking my partner to help me with this. And there's nothing wrong with that. Relationships are great because you're there to help each other. But since that's not an option available to me right now, I bit the bullet, got the job done, and added a new skill and experience to my quiver.

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #23

Because I can hang out with my guy friends as much as I want. It doesn't matter if I talk to him like a best girlfriend, or that we flirt, or even if we've had sex a few times before. Our friendship can remain completely authentic, and I can hang out with them, and make more dude friends as much as I want.

Reasons I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #22

Because hanging out with an ex-boyfriend and running into old flings can be a fun, interesting night instead of an awkward one. ;)

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #21

Because I have more personal time to explore a larger amount of my interests and hobbies. Let's face it, free time is a commodity. And one of the great things about relationships is the companionship. So when I'm dating, it's only natural that a decent chunk of my free time is spent hanging out with that person, generally doing things we both like. Which leaves way less time to pursue interests I have outside of the relationship. Being single, there's just more availability for whatever hobbies I feel like delving into: reading books, yoga, bike rides, jewelry making, artwork, dancing, gardening, music, sewing, etc. It's the greatest time to explore a wide range of activities and learn new things!

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #20

Because it's a good opportunity to find out who your true-blue friends are. If I have a weird emergency, or an unpleasant task at hand, there's no boyfriend around to help me, someone that is motivated by romantic love or sexual favors. I wish I could do everything on my own. But much to my disappointment, I cannot. That means I need to call on my trusted friends for not-so-pleasant favors from time to time. And it's great to know I have awesome friends that will answer to that call. It's also a good life skill to learn to be okay to ask for help. That's Part B to this reason. Friendships and communities both thrive on an exchange of services to each other. We're all here to help each other thrive and succeed. By not having one immediate go-to person, I've learned to depend on my friends, my family, my community, and how to ask for help. Because of a larger need, I know and recognize the people I can trust to have my back and be there for me. And that is invaluable. Even going to into a relationship, I know that my partner and I both have these people to count on. And I know that because of how they've been there for me now when I've needed them the most.

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #19

Since it already came up on an earlier Facebook post, I'll just go ahead and use the topic as my next reason. Because I don't ever have to hold in my farts when I'm lounging around the house. It's awkward and uncomfortable. And it can inhibit a healthy poop. My body can function freely as nature intended without causing anyone else any displeasure or having to be sneaky.

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #18

Because getting ready for work every morning is easier. I just wake up, get ready, and go. I don't have to wake up extra early (when I really want to snuggle more) because I'm in someone else's bed, and I have to drive home to begin my getting ready for work process. It's really less annoying to already be at home when you wake up to start your day.Those extra 15-20 minutes in the morning are critical!

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #17

Because zero consultations need to be made in regard to my future. If I decided I would like to pick up and move away, well, I could just make a plan to do that and do it. It's even just more fun daydreaming about things when I know I have the freedom to do whatever I want. The world is my oyster. :)

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #16

Ok, so I have to admit, this reason is a little special. It was presented to me by a friend while we were dancing. She suggested the following: "because I don't have to dance with anyone but I can dance with whoever I want!" Well shit, that's a fucking awesome reason in my book. And totally true. So that, my friends, is my reason #16. I'm pretty sure that place missed my friends and I when we left. We lit up the dance floor with our shenanigans. Happy dancing to all!

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #15

(Milestone - half way through my reasons! I don't feel like I've had any far stretches so far, so I'm feeling good about this.)

Because all the plans you make are just a little bit more exciting when you're single. Why? Because the day/night could lead to anything! When you're coupled up, you pretty much know how the day will wrap up. When you're single, even the most arbitrary of plans can turn into something you never expected. Your standard Friday night date with one of your best girlfriends can turn into mushrooms & hot tub time with an a old fling. (Not that this ever happened to me, of course) But you just never know. ;)

Why I Appreciate Being Single - Reason #14

Because it's easier to eat healthy. Eating is more of an event when you're sharing a meal with someone. I love cooking for people, and when I'm cooking for a boy, it's not always the lightest of fare. If I'm having dinner alone I might just eat a bowl of brussel sprouts and be done with it. There's no one suggesting we get pizza while we do our laundry or watch that episode of Game of Thrones. I eat more salads. And I rarely eat sweets when I'm home alone. There's no boy hanging out late at night with the munchies tempting me with a spoonful of their ice cream. ;)